You are gone
Though I always swore you would not be
& then you’d look at me
Your eyes as tired as every
Sleepless night you suffered &
Every poison that traced your veins
You’d tell me that you hoped that I
You’re gonna get better.
I would say
& always from you, I hope so.
I had enough optimism for the both of us
& now that aches the matter even more
In some strange way, I feel like a liar
Oh you are joyous & free, I know.
But I wanted to see you better here.
To acquire the body you deserved back
To dine happily in nodding laughter
To rest in your dwelling, cozy splendor
To set out in your boat neath a
Flickering cleared sun
Your heart shouting joy!
The battle is won!
& like catching two lost summers
You would be gone for days
But now you are gone forever
& that hurts just like it sounds
I’ve stopped trying to understand.
I will miss you.
dedicated to my brother Mark, who battled cancer for two years and just when it seemed like all was about to be well, he was gone- august 24, 2011.
one day i will see you again.